Cartoon Cocks
Up a tree! Possibly an ancient cartoon cock.

Up a tree! Possibly an ancient cartoon cock.

Someone (not me) drew a tiny wang on the notice in our work toilet.
I also took a close up and a picture of the cover up but can’t work out how to send more than one photo at once.

Someone (not me) drew a tiny wang on the notice in our work toilet.

I also took a close up and a picture of the cover up but can’t work out how to send more than one photo at once.

On the side of a tree in Alexandra park in Windsor. 

On the side of a tree in Alexandra park in Windsor. 

Cartoon wang gracefully scratched in the ice on the window of a taxi.

Cartoon wang gracefully scratched in the ice on the window of a taxi.

Sender elaborates: Smeary cock on the side of Sainsbury’s Maidenhead. I didn’t stop to investigate what substance has been used to create it, I hope it’s toothpaste.
Category: Medium unknown, supermarket
Balls: Yes
Hair: No
Spunk: No
Helmet: No
No. I’m sorry, but no. No panache, no style. Penis artists: if you can’t be bothered then neither can we.
Cock rating: 1/10 Poor

Sender elaborates: Smeary cock on the side of Sainsbury’s Maidenhead. I didn’t stop to investigate what substance has been used to create it, I hope it’s toothpaste.

Category: Medium unknown, supermarket

Balls: Yes

Hair: No

Spunk: No

Helmet: No

No. I’m sorry, but no. No panache, no style. Penis artists: if you can’t be bothered then neither can we.

Cock rating: 1/10 Poor

Category: Graffiti (subway)
Balls: Yes
Hair: No
Spunk: No
Helmet: Yes
Given its location in a busy subway, the creator of this piece could reasonably have been pushed for time before the filth arrived. However, in our view, that is no excuse for such a slapdash cock and shows a lack of commitment and imagination on the part of the artist.
We don’t usually go in for scathing reviews of cocks and we love simplicity, but this! Is it even a cock? It could be a sad duck. No effort has been made to make a statement with the cock, assuming that it is one. 
Artists: If you’re pushed for time with your centrally located cock, why not make a stencil before setting out? Preparing in advance allows one to produce a high standard cock with minimum fuss and to be in and out before anyone notices. 
Frankly, we’re not even convinced that this artist has ever even seen a penis.
Cock rating: 3/10 (points awarded for a daring location, only)

Category: Graffiti (subway)

Balls: Yes

Hair: No

Spunk: No

Helmet: Yes

Given its location in a busy subway, the creator of this piece could reasonably have been pushed for time before the filth arrived. However, in our view, that is no excuse for such a slapdash cock and shows a lack of commitment and imagination on the part of the artist.

We don’t usually go in for scathing reviews of cocks and we love simplicity, but this! Is it even a cock? It could be a sad duck. No effort has been made to make a statement with the cock, assuming that it is one.

Artists: If you’re pushed for time with your centrally located cock, why not make a stencil before setting out? Preparing in advance allows one to produce a high standard cock with minimum fuss and to be in and out before anyone notices.

Frankly, we’re not even convinced that this artist has ever even seen a penis.

Cock rating: 3/10 (points awarded for a daring location, only)

Category: Graffiti (shed)
Balls: Yes
Hair: No
Spunk: No
Helmet: Yes
We’ve actually had this particular cock submitted more than once, which just goes to show how engaging it is. 
Just what is the artist trying to say? Is the cock flaccid, perhaps communicating the artist’s feelings of emasculation in a post-feminist world? Is the cock at half-mast, signalling confusion or insecurity? Does the frankly severe Jap’s eye hint at the increasing gap between rich and poor? Are the slightly overlapping balls a nod to this year’s Olympic Games? Does the artist disapprove of the Games and think they were bollocks, or did they give him a semi?
We may never know. What we do know is that this spraypainted cock on the side of a shed in an allotment adjoining a nature reserve is as thought provoking as it is bold. More like this, please.
Cock rating: 8/10

Category: Graffiti (shed)

Balls: Yes

Hair: No

Spunk: No

Helmet: Yes

We’ve actually had this particular cock submitted more than once, which just goes to show how engaging it is. 

Just what is the artist trying to say? Is the cock flaccid, perhaps communicating the artist’s feelings of emasculation in a post-feminist world? Is the cock at half-mast, signalling confusion or insecurity? Does the frankly severe Jap’s eye hint at the increasing gap between rich and poor? Are the slightly overlapping balls a nod to this year’s Olympic Games? Does the artist disapprove of the Games and think they were bollocks, or did they give him a semi?

We may never know. What we do know is that this spraypainted cock on the side of a shed in an allotment adjoining a nature reserve is as thought provoking as it is bold. More like this, please.

Cock rating: 8/10

Category: Art Cock
Balls: Yes
Hair: Yes
Spunk: No
Helmet: Yes
A beautifully rendered, delightfully shiny cock nestling among the leaves here. It’s not your average toilet wall scribble by any means. It’s a cock your nan might have on a commemorative plate. It’s a cock you can gaze at and revel in all the detail. A cock to return to again and again. 
The artist clearly loves the cock dearly.
Cock rating: 9/10

Category: Art Cock

Balls: Yes

Hair: Yes

Spunk: No

Helmet: Yes

A beautifully rendered, delightfully shiny cock nestling among the leaves here. It’s not your average toilet wall scribble by any means. It’s a cock your nan might have on a commemorative plate. It’s a cock you can gaze at and revel in all the detail. A cock to return to again and again. 

The artist clearly loves the cock dearly.

Cock rating: 9/10

Show us your cock

Not that. Oh please not that.

What we’re looking for are particularly good examples of cartoon cocks and balls you’ve seen on public transport, under railway arches, in lavatories. Anywhere the cartoon cock and ball fairy has visited.

Please do not send in pictures of actual willies or we’ll tell your mum.

http://cartooncocks.tumblr.com/submit

ROBOTS OR DINOSAURS?

I’m afraid this site is just cocks. I’m sure you can find an alternative website to cater to your frankly DISGUSTING tastes.